Thursday, August 23, 2012

back dated post since May 2012 ~ A Regret is just another motivation

The last few weeks had been surprisingly different from the normal (mundane) routine of my life.

I had taken things (everything in general) to a new level by stepping out of my comfort zone. First and most importantly, being taking the initiative to contact the school band for a tickets to catch the SYF2012.

I neither talk much nor bring myself back to those secondary school days alot because somehow, the memories werent all good. This being said, i had only myself to blame for being too competitive and thus not being able to accept failure.

The school band days were perhaps the most glory (apart from the fact that i had the honor of making lifetime best friends) days of my childhood that i can possibly remembered. I will always remember how i am fond of thinking of myself as being as masculine as the guys in school. The truth was, i wasnt looking at my best then and to add on, i was in love with my brother's clothing and thus attribute to my masculine taste - i like guys.. never was and never will be a butch. Being in the military band was the toughest decision i had to make.

Moving forward (after running several thoughts in my mind and finally deciding to fast forward till i grad), upon graduating from the band, i had return and stayed on to help out with the SYF that shall took place (probably the ONLY thing DMB work hard for every single year)... All in all, it was being a alumni that had me packing up and leaving for good. I dont remember much from that experience (clearly, the brain had done a brilliant job of erasing all terrible things that had happened to me) except that leaving the team was on a sad note.

Nevertheless, the passion never dies and i doubt it ever would. i'll liken this effect to the guys talking about their army-dazes each time they meet, even if they are from different "platoon". There is always a common interest for military band and the conversation can be spark off with a "marching" "drink up" "music"... etc etc..

And so, with special thanks from the Alma mater, i finally pick up enough courage to face the one thing i thought i had let go, but actually didnt.

First up was a assessment band. i was unfamiliar with this term and thank God for the other friendly Deyian who had enlighten me. It was actually the process the school bands had to go through (and acheive 2 consecutive Gold awards) to be eligible for the display competition SYF.

The school that took part this year was Monfort Sec, i notice the school had sent their students to show the band support. They cheer for the small group as they march forward, carrying with pride, and put on a performance to impress the judges. For their effort, they were awarded a Silver. (i heard they were awarded Gold previously)    first sign that the judging took a new twist
Wow-ing the crowd next (and also the first official band competing for the Central Judging - Display) is Bukit Panjang Government High

The downside of being the first band to display was that the impression often doesnt last very long.

i remember there was a young man who was walking the band though their perfomance.. He was "supposedly" drawing/creating/inventing/starting something new for America. Many had commented it was hard trying to figure just what exactly he was doing, running across the formation, sometimes pointing to something "not far away".. other times releasing his "inner emotions". Maybe i am not such a writer after all, haha..
I didnt think the colour guards (namely, the ladies that were picked out to don pretty attires while dancing with flag that was suppose to soften the display instead of making it look stern with the marching and music going on) were "fully utilised". They didnt glue with the rest of the band very well during the performance.

Bukit Panjang Government High was awarded silver. It was great effort so thumbs up for the performance =)

------------------Moving on-----------------------
The next performance in line was the one i was looking forward too. Having been thru the preparation for the compeition before. I was more than anxious to witness for myself what surprise Deyi has in line for us.

i vividly remember hearing a nice schoolmates (Jinyu) commenting this.. ."you know how stressing it must have been for the students? Whatever we have trained to impress the crowed, our juniors has to know the SAME while learning MORE stunts to keep up with the reputation. "

And had it not been for her casual remark i would never have thought of things this way.

It was silly for any of us, who had "been there, done that" to ever assume we are the best - we ain't - we were merely the example the next person follows so as to modify/improve on it to make it better. It must have been extremely tough for anyone to actually prove that they are equally - if not better.  While i did not react greatly to that comment Jinyu made, i was once again, filled with lotsa of emotions, and heartache for the bandmembers who had to try harder and harder to achieve that sort of expectation we have for them.

The cheering went louder at our side of the stadium, as most of the DMB ex-members seats together and screaming our lungs out hoping DMB had heard our support! i saw the alumni preparing the band for the march in... By this time i had goosebump all over my arms... and i wont be surprise if all DMB ex-member felt the same. We were trained before - for the same reason - albeit the different competition years.

The members getting ready for the shortest- most terrifying moments - of their secondary school lives.
Our classic style of starting the performance by facing against the judges.

Abrupt ending to the post as I got pretty much drifted away. Nevertheless, despite the disappointing result towards the end, i know what the students have been thru and for those who end up graduating without a chance to fight for another award, the after-effect can be very draining. 

No comments: