How the cyst really looks like

In short, as soon as i've gotten discharge and finally left NUH.. the journey back home was exceptionally good....

Lilsis had stayed over the night before, and to accompany her was a laptop and loads of DVD that was supposedly meant for me during my stay (but the pills make me nausea most of the time hence my loss, her privilege) The nurse warn us about her forbidden stay so poor lilsis woke up next morning as early as 6am (before i could wake up) and she walked around the hospital till the start of visiting hours.. my kudos to her patience. (i couldnt do the same)

Anyway, Lilsis took 2 weeks off her work to keep me accompanied during my stay at home.. we mostly eat.. and eat.. and sleep and eat more... my weight (like you saw above) was 45kg the moment i was home (due to the liquid diet) and mum's strict NOs list of food.

one of my all-time favourite porridge- ABC porridge (because Mum dont have a proper name for it)

Ingredient contains Spinach, Tomato, Fish. Mum use to feed all her kids this when we were as young as toddler... this is my comfort food when i fall sick or when i need to nurse someone close.

 Black pepper macaroni... another of Mum's creation when i complain the food was blunt and i am losing appetite. She stir fried the macaroni with Vegetarian black pepper, prefereably the ONLY black sauce she allows me to eat during this period.

Lilsis got too bored and painted my nails with images of Bunnies+carrot and all things cute.. dont you find them lovely?

A picture of Timmy (yes.. this is the new Timmy now.. ) and me... The design on the nails were inspired from Timmy =)

i am encourage to wear a band around my stomach to prevent big movement from hurting the organs inside. There is sudden loose space in the stomach and the band will helps tighten and secure all the internal organs, keeping them in place.

So prior to valentine's day, bbbb and i had no choice but to celebrate the day at my place. With quarantine orders from everyone, i was unable to grab him a good gift and thus, i've decided to him a sushi bento in the shape of his best toy- PS3 controller....

 Sounds interesting and cool... until i screw it up... like this -->

bbbbbbbb could not figure what this was.. .and i got slightly affected, blame my bad handicraft....

Anyhow, the taste was fabulous and i cannot wait to eat the same salmon-onigiri again given the chance.

except this time.. hahaha.... no more controller.. phew!~

Checl out the rich fillings! i had pan fried some salmon and stir them into the rice before wrapping them up...

I hope bbbb didnt find the Valentine day too lousy... promise i'll make it up to him next year...

Me in my PJ eating breakfast.... i only wear loose clothing during the recuperation because the wound were still fresh and i do not want any fabric sticking onto to it...

Breakfast is wholemeal bread with Nutella... Me loves!

Oh and an bonus picture of Boy (the chihuahua) starely at me too cutely hopping to eat some bread... Do not feed dogs with human food if it contains sugar/salt/artificial flavoring.. 

 My boyfriend isnt someone who is good with words. He admit that himself... Thus.. when it comes to expressing himself, he can hardly make it right and many times, i end up misunderstanding him.

This time, per his claim, he found an card that read exactly what he has to say... and so... it touches me so much... i love darby

And with all the other far-too-random stuff i've done to keep myself busy.. i've finalyl recovered in good condition to head back to work.

I cannot thank everyone;s encouragement enough. There were certainly dilemma during knowing the news of the cyst--> Cystectomy --> recovery.. But i guess i made the correct choice of sharing the news on facebook because otherwise i would not have the courage to get the op going.

Believe it or not, i re-read each and every consolation over and over again prior to the op. Had i felt like i wasnt alone? Definitely!.. and i am thankful i;ve walk through this journey till now.

i have not yet share the result of the cyst.. and before i can do so i just wanna tell anyone who is worried abt me that --> i can do it.. i am strong. Thank you for showing your concern yet again... and sorry i had to disappoint you with the bad news.. yes.. the cyst isnt just any normal cyst.

In short, i am glad for now, that the cyst has been remove... and what's in line in my future now behold great commitment into treatment after treatment. People often saw on TV how cancer becomes such a serious matter.. but they are actually different stages of them...

Many woman as young as my age are suffering from minor changes in cancer... (Stage 1a)... and i am one of the "lucky" ones... but friends, things aint going to end just yet.... like it or not.. i am surviving this challenge #likeaboss

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picture of the cyst coming up./... if you cannot take gore.... pplease close the window now and i promise to replace the post with happy images so you can soon forget it happened

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This is the Cyst inside my stomach.. .and that finger you see belong to my surgeon... the cyst measures 30cm and weights about 4litre... This is the "thing" ive carried with me for 8years,heavier than most newborn babies.. .somewhat equivalent to twin..

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this is the TIMMY i talk about.... over and over again.. and there goes Timmy..

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i need to clarify.... i am cancer-free AT THE MOMENT (so please dont feel upset).... all i need now is to cross my fingers and pray every 6 months that there are no reoccurence of the cyst. The doctor found mucinous cells inside the cyst and this are USUALLY found in cancer patients.. Therefore for now i am categorise as a Stage 1a cancer patient...

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but i think God is fair, and that i have never been too nasty a person to deserve too worst a ending.

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i will/must be well to lead the rest of the life i have.. living a blissful life and appreciating each and every of my friends and loved ones.. i wont go too soon, i need to be around..

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i'm getting emotional... signing off.



~Sweet.Silly.Stinky.Sleepyhead~

Day 3 & 4

Meiqin on the left and Sha (Fongyi) on the right












Moving forward into the second night, i am still overwhelmed by all the supports everyone has given me... i think no one should be allowed to keep a dark secret like an operation, especially since i've experience for myself the sort of motivation everyone can give to push me along.. somehow.. despite the pain of the process, i've been urged to show off the scar.. which is very good because i no longer see it as such a huge deal. Its like a scar of victory *wink*

The second night bbbbb's buddies -  Meiqing and Sha came to visit. Mum had initially tot they were my classmates (which was ALSO true since Meiqin and i studied a couple of subjects together back in SIM) She soon learn they were actually bbbbb's ex-polymates and were touched even they are here to show some support.

What's even more amusing was the gift from these two ladies.... LilSis was beaming with joy when i told her they bought me some(not one.. quite a few) nail polish and Hello Kitty Mask!!!! Like Sha had joked, this is suppose to be a holiday expedition for me... and looking at the gifts, i had to agreed, in my mind i cannot wait to dash on the lovely colors on my naked nails and throw on the mask to mosturize my face.

Javier-Kristal-Zhennan

Tina-Liza-Paperstop-Sharen-Tracy-Celine-Shasha

In addition, my ex-colleagues from Takasago sent two representative + one spouse(hurhur) to visit.. along with a HUGE hamper... thanks ladies... and gentlemen....

Its very nice to catch up and hear about the people whom i've met and worked with some time ago, they've witness the growth of Timmy, joke along with me and even taught me how to deal with pregnancy (since i've always joke that i was pregnant... and in between this period several of the colleagues got pregnant too)

bbbb was puzzled how i get two hamper from two different companies? I love them all so much, everyone's so nice and sending me well wishes....Both my current company and the one i left not longer ago had sent something over, i just cannot thank anyone enough...

First attempt at food after liquid diet.... it was (what was claimed) sweet and sour tofu and cabbages with porridge.. i tried a bit but the taste was too overwhelming.. i could barely finish half. Check out the tubes all inserted on my left fist.


















By the third day i was frustrated and irritated... my mood was swinging badly.... i THOUGHT my doctor mention something about me being discharged but when the nurses came and told me they werent told to remove anything from my body... i was suspicious...

bbbb came really early.. (having leave the hospital every night only at about 10pm.. ) with some neccessity i complain i was short of (*talcum powder because i felt very dirty not being able to bath.. Salonpas because the bed was hurting my back too much.. Marigold jelly as it was the only food that came into mind..) i told him i was suppose to be discharge today... and bbbb request for the doctor to speak to us to confirm this...

Dr Sabrina came and looked at me worrying... she apologize for the hurtful blood drawing experience yesterday (she is very very thin , beautiful and she volunteer her hand to grab mine when the other doctor drew the blood from my wrist... it took 4 diff doctors to draw blood for me... )  i asked her if she still meant what she says about me being discharge.. and she gave me a chance to prove to her...

She asked if i was well enough to stand up... and i was! i held on to my wound, and used the other hand to support my body from the bed and stood up straight facing bbbbb and Dr Sabrina.... she smiled and said "i was this close to allowing your discharge but your blood sample this morning has proven to deteriorate further to 6 (normal woman - 14, me on day two - 7)... but you look really well right now.. you can stand............."

i cannot update further because at this point i had sunk right back into blank point.. i felt nausea and semi-conscious and worst of all.. i felt i was too weak to hold my body further... bbbbb held on to me in time to place me back on the bed gently...

i teared so much because i knew the answer.... Dr Sabrina rejected my discharge and i was to stayed one more day at the hospital..... she left and it was bbbb who had to cope with my wining and sobbing... at how hard this is getting.. i have enough of hospital food, being stuck here not being able to move around, i cannot tell night from day and i haven seen any green grass... i want to leave.... need to leave... bbbb calm me down but it wasnt enough to cheer me up.

By now i felt hopeless.... i thought it was a simple procedure.. a small op and i can leave with a new body... why had things complicate till this stage? Whatever i had in mind wasnt positive, bbbbb must have had a hard time dealing with my emotions... thank God that Mum and Sis came by at this time to distract me. bbbbb updated Mum about my stay and she put it off with a nonchalent "then one more day lah, what to do"
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which was completely true at a practical level... i felt like i was given a tight slap across my face and immediately felt "anything lah!"... hahaha... the strength of all mother is the power they have to tell you to "deal with it" in the most practical way ever!

Mum and the nurse held on to me while i make my way to the toilet.






Also bbbbb's proudest moment as he upload this picture online with the caption at my first successful attempt to walk on my own.. without fainting.. hahahah











We spend the afternoon expecting more friends to visit (thanks guys/girls/besties... i REALLY appreciate it.. from the bottom of my heart... REALLY.. TRULY... )

In the afternoon, bbbbb's Dad came down to visit me. bbbbb's family has an alliance occupation (this is a long story.. in short.. a family business) in construction and his Dad happens to be running a project right in NUH itself.. therefore during his lunch hour he came by to visit and sometime later so did bbbbb's family... They got me a soft Bunny that i badly wanted... and thus came the birth of Timmy. I name this Bunny Timmy and assume he was given birth at a hefty weight of 4.5kg (my cyst came up to 4litre worth of water).  We had a mini gathering there and then in the ward joking.

Both families were talking... what a lovely sight =)

Later in the afternoon Pauline, her sister Evelyn and her fiance came by to send some well wishes, and a sweet bouquet of flowers. I haven met Pau for a while i miss her dearly. We did some catching up, some congrats (Evelyn and her long-term bf are finally getting hitch) and i showed off my new found rib-cage.


random side note........ i HAVE ribcage.. and this is the FIRST TIME i saw them/felt them protruding under my skin... sorry for the random but very very touching news.

Anyway, they left a sweet note on the bouquet to congrats me on my new-found sexiness... and i really love this message... Thank you Kang family (and Ms-soon-to-be-wang) and thank you so much for the very very genuine concern you've showered me with. The lovely Evelyn also mention passing me some of her clothes which is very comforting yet humorous to hear because she's really really tall and skinny....

bbbbb and i spent most of the time when we weren't expecting any visitor just falling in and out of sleep, with me having the comfort of the bed and his trying not to fall off the chair. He brought along the familiar pillow that i use when i sleep over at his place so we had more than enough pillows to share.

By evening, the doctor sent a message knowing i was deeply affected over my extended stay, they were going to infuse a pack of blood (to be deliver from blood bank which will take more than half a day)into me hoping it will aid my red blood cells count and HOPFULLY bring it up to a healthy level of AT LEAST 10. The nurses told me i could be discharge if the results are good. I was getting some good news and heave a huge sigh of relief!

The last pair of visitors for Day 3 is Apel and Andy.



i didnt manage much dinner that night and took some jelly instead. bbbbb continue to keep me accompanied and along came an old-time friend.















Nope, not really that old but it was Apel yap with whom i have a love/hate relationship with. Apel and i share the same thinking in alot of matters. Therefore many times, despite not meeting for a long time, when we do catch up it's easy to update each other for we can piece the missing puzzle back pretty fast.

This trip Apel/Andy made was an important (hahahahah) one.... Apel has recently receive a gorgeous ring from her very lovely Andy and they are in the mist of planning for a solid future together. With Apel around, it isnt hard to hint *erm-hem bbbbb alot of things that should be in our relationship "flow" right now... hurhurhur


As our conversation flows, Apel updated me on their plans right now, and in turn when i was asked about [our] plan, i simply looked at bbbbb and he had the cutest most innocent "please-dont-ask-me" look on his face.

i bet the talk was fruitful (thanks Apel Yap) in giving my boyfriend a small nudge..


Day four
By now waking up becomes a routine and my back hurts at its extreme so i was repeating everything i did, EXCEPT i demanded to be doing all of this thing by myself. I took short walks to the ladies, fed myself food and played with my phone. Nothing new.

The blood finally arrived inside a small blue ice cooler tub today! I dont like how it looks, but it was the last resort so i have to give it a shot.

Written on the bag of blood was the word "Volunteer Blood" it reminded me of the time i tried to donate mine and in return someone has donated their blood to me!

By now i have one more needle inserted onto my left arm for easy induce of extra medication if needed (i.e if i faint, i need BOTH lactose/glucose inside me). The nurse replaces the lactose tube with the tube that link to the blood.

I was made to sign a consent form agreeing that the hospital holds no responsibility if the blood is found to contain HIV (my mind went like$%&%^&&^*^&* when i sign it). bbbbb used Timmy to cover my face becase i confess there were too many bloody tots running inside my mind.

At that point i had a scene from Twilight movie replaying inside my head, where Bella had blood kept in a cup with straw and she drank them. i asked bbbb if it was easier that i get blood into my body in that way...

When my family visited (Thank you Gary's buddies the ONLY few best friends of his for visiting) they were amuse by the blood i was "drinking" / transfusing...

Strangely... i was feeling better and better, waaaaaaaaaaay better than i was the last few days..... i got the blood, and i felt the "POWER" of the blood.. hahahahhaa...

Anyhow,... i barely remember anything from Day 4 cos i was too EAGER to head home.. Lilsis was the Sweetest thing when she volunteer to stay behind to keep me company for the night.

 

~Sweet.Silly.Stinky.Sleepyhead~

Day 1&2 in NUH

While staying in NUH, alot of my friends came to visit me. I had told them not to do it since it was during CNY period, but those that wasnt pan-dang came anyhow.

First flowers that came was from Indium Corporation, the company i am working for now. \

I am really thankful to be given the opportunity to be working for them. It was through one of the closer colleague/manager that i secure an appointment to visit a gynae and speed up the entire process till date.

Even though i haven been with the company long enough to be secure as a permanent employee, they were kind enough to rest assure me that health was my priority. The HR even do their utmost to help me claim some cost incurred during the op, i cannot thank them enough.

My colleagues were also worried about the op, thus i had pre-alert bbbb to update them soon as i finish the op. Within the day itself they had sent me flowers, they are so thoughtful that even my parents were touched.

Then sweet Paperstop came to visit me.

No pictures of her so i grab one we took during the CNY.


She had finished her school and came by to drop us a visit. i could hardly speak but she was careful not to make me laugh. i was still on "drug" thus the pain didnt hurt that much.


Paperstop stayed for a while but i was falling in and out of sleep. She finally left after a while. Thanks dear for coming, and visiting me again when i was grounded at home. She is such a doll, when i needed help preparing the food for valentine's day for bbbb... she came by my place and with my maid's help, i hopped on the bus and we went "marketing together" =, she even offer to carry the shopping bags and refuse my help. i cant find another "smaller-sized" sweetheart than this one (she's a size zero)

This is Angeline, she drop by suddenly - like her name was made to sound... like an angel- turns out she's a staff of NUH and upon hearing i was going to be admitted here had decided to drop a surprise visit.

Which was really good since the nurse concluded that she drop by (she has role in making sure patients are well taken care of) i must have been an important patient, and thus they were extra diligent in taking care of me.

Angeline is my childhood pen-pal and we exchange letters for YEARS, until one fine day she disappear in my life and i couldnt understand what i have done wrong. Many years later, upon learning the truth, i felt like we were in the same boat. Therefore her visit was comforting, especially coming from someone who understood completely the pain this process will bring. Thanks Angeline =)









The first day was easy to get by. I thought i would have difficulty sleeping alone in the hospital ward, but this fear was resolved since i knew it was that easy to fall asleep when i put on drip. The first day i had glucose induce in me, the urinary tract was also on, i neither pee nor eat, i was amazed how much medical has advanced. I also constantly remember how i use to sleep beside Grandma, randomly massaging her swollen hands and the glucose will seep through every tiny holes that the nurses had used to inject her medication.

There were alot of blood pressure, heartbeat taken. Dr Sabrina (my surgeon) came to visit me once, she said i look like i;ll be well enough to be discahrge tomorrow. She instruct the nurse to feed me liquid food tomorrow, that night i was amazed at my willpower and how fast i was picking up in health. I can be discharge already? hahahaha.. that night i slept with a smile on my face, in between being awoken by nurses to take blood pressure and eating medication.

The next morning , before bbbbbb could come, i asked the nurse if they could remove my urinary tract, and so she did, i wanted to start walking and she held on to my drip while i started walking towards the ladies. That morning, i fainted, it was my first ever UN-conscious faint because i dont remember anything that took placed.

When i did woke up, i heard the nurse says "Kristal,stay awake, dont fall asleep... Kristal... are you ok... her blood pressure is really look... put her back on drip... Kristal.. wake up.. dont sleep... " and then i look around me and realise i was back on my bed with 4 nurses around me, my pant were wet, the drip on my left hand was replace with a lactose, and there was a band around my arm to constantly monitor my blood pressure... i cried and apologies and talk nonsence (i cant remember much) they said i wet my pant, then proceed to change them. They smile at me and told me every thing was fine.... i had very low blood pressure (i remember i was on the 70 when the norm range was 100).

That afternoon, bbbb;s family and mine were in the ward. So was Raymond my babyCuz

CusRay and i on his first bookout many years ago

Bbbbbb's family when we went on a ice-cream expedition on his birthday last year.

My family last CNY















it feels rather weird to be talking to them on the bed when i am usually the more hype-up one... everyone were genuinely concern and that makes me wanna cheer up and recover faster. i told them about the faint-experience that morning and got Mum pretty worried. She asked me to try eating some food but i wasnt in the mood.

Anyhow i tried my first lunch - sweet potato porridge with sweet and sour tofu.. and it was then i had my SECOND semi-conscious faint. Mum called the docter and again they took my blood pressure... i was looking pale and after some discussion, the doctor advise me they will be taking some blood sample to test for the result.

We spend the afternoon talking and getting all worried about me (in my mind i recall i use to have difficulty drawing blood and was crossing my finger this time it would be less difficult).

Sheena came that day, she was an trusty friend i met during my short work stay with a bad company, Sheena's optometrist and very health-conscious. However, as i was tied down by alot of nurses trip, she made a short visit and soon left. Afterwhich i receive a text from her saying how she saw me in pain and did not want to tear in front of me and my family. Thank you Sheena, your visit meant alot to me, especially since we hadnt really been friends for long but you are always so supportive and friendly, i cant find another person so genuinely concern about a new friend than yourself.

My surgeon came and spoke to me, she offer to draw my blood sample which wasnt much of a problem - except they couldnt find my veins....- and that feeling sucks.... When she notify me she had to draw blood from my wrist..... i cry-out-loud. Literally....

outside the curtain, bbbb describe my begging as a fearful one, he said they were all so worried about me and could hear my pain as i sob and sometimes scream aloud (when the needles were poke thrice on my left arm, thrice on my right arm, once on my right wrist, once from the needle that was dripping lactose into my body, and once on my fist... ALL THIS IN ATTEMPT TO DRAW 50ml of blood for blood sampling.... can you imagine how THIN my veins are... )

i cannot describe the pain... really... i will never consider WRIST-cutting as an attempt to end my life... it hurts TOO MUCH.. if you know how it feels when the needle first poke the bone before drawing blood.. you know EXACTLY what i'm talking about. They draw my blood thrice during my entire stay...and every single trip it hurts like f**k..... *shakes head just thinking back


~Sweet.Silly.Stinky.Sleepyhead~

The actual procedure

after undergoing what seems like the toughest challenge in my entire life (physically).. i'm finally up and healthy enough to pen this journey onto the blog. Along with only picture (just one pic of Timmy.. its too gruesome) of my stay with National university Hospital.

this is Timmy inside my stomach and the stomach i've living with for 8 years.

Got my lilbro to capture a nicest moment i could have with Timmy.

Believe it or not, i haven breathe out, you can check with my close friends how the Stomach look had i breathe out.

Before my op, my parents had done all that they could to keep the process less horrifying for me. Perhaps bbbbbbbb was right, i tend to "over-think" things too much thus leading to the fear that could have much been avoided.

Thus the family had relatives over for dinner, alongside celebrating Chinese New Year as well as the birthday of 2 of our relatives. Each family was assign the task of bring one type of food... This sort of potluck never really works with our family because every typical family brings more than ONE type of their specialty. Thus there were so much food it was hard to finish (in addition to the fact that i was 24 hrs away from my Op and i had to clear my bowel later that night and had little appetite just thinking of the process.

So bbbb had volunteer to stayover the night before, which was something i was so thankful for. Had i need to sleep the night knowing the next morning was the op, i wouldnt have slept a wink, but then again, there and then i was hoping to get as little sleep as possible. The silly me was fearful to wake up DURING the op, i cant imagine what sort of scenario that would be.

That morning, after visiting the toilet for only once, i woke up and got myself ready for the op. I washed my hair since Mum says i wont be able to do so during my stay the hospital (which was pretty much the case since i can barely lift myself up from the bed).

During the journey to the hospital (Mum drove and bbbb was in the backseat)... i was keeping a positive mind, i guess a part of me was dying for the process to be over and done with ASAP. Hence, i took a picture of myself in the car (before dusk) and started an album on facebook sharing the process of my soon-to-be new Kristal.

Having reach the hospital, we walked into the department called the Day Surgery Ward, it was pretty comforting to see other family "checking in" for their op too. However, most of them came with nothing, i suppose the Day Surgery ward was meant for patient with simple op. Since i belong here, my op should be a pretty tiny process.

We waited for our number and was told by the nurse that i had turn up a tad bit early (it wasnt my fault since the nurse gave us the wrong timing) and so with that, i changed into my op robe and waiting in the waiting bed that was supposedly meant for pregnant woman to prepare for their cesarean.

Due to my weak body (like i mention i have never been a red meat eater thus i knew from the start i weak metabolism) and high drug allergy (the irony for me is i've a bad allergy towards.... PAINKILLER.... now what else stops the pain?) i was given special tag to notify whoever was going to induce anything into me to take note.

bbb took a picture of my arm, with my name and IC no and all the info, there and then in the ward i saw alot of ppl talking about their short surgery and how they can be discharge with immediate effect..

i bet they were there for minor op such as removal of warts or something.

bbbb took a picture of me and Monkey, which is the plush toy i carry to bed since i took over its ownership from my cousin... its been loved by me ever since =)

Here on the bed, i could heard other pregnant woman besides me getting ready for their baby's arrival.i was trying to get use to sleeping on this sort of bed.

The wait was torturing so Mum and bbbbb went on to grab their morning dose of coffee while i took the time to relax my mind.

During the wait, a lady came over and spoke to me about donating my Cyst to the research centre for investigation of cure for cancer. I was a little apprehend since bbbb had notify me about this issue and he was advice by his colleague to refuse this.

I, however, see no use to the cyst that was to be remove hence, i asked the lady to allow me till i spoke to my family before making the decision.

While chatting with the lady, we were interrupted by a nurse who mention i was to prepare for my op, my op was schedule for 11 and it was only 9.30am in the morning. i felt a strong rush of blood into my brain and immediately called Mum and bbbb, who rushed back to accompanied me. The nurse got me seated on the wheelchair and placed a blanket over my lap. I was freaked out at the sudden fast forward of arrangement, but tried my best not to tear.

Then i was wheel to the other part of the hospital, Mum and bbbbb walk alongside me. I couldnt speak, i was scared stiff. Mum refuse to speak to me, she was an emotional baby like i was.... Then before we part, she cried so badly i couldnt contain my tear either. She asked me to relax, and while tearing the nurse whisk me into the theatre....

There are no pictures during the process. I remember being placed at a waiting room to calm myself down, there were so many activities going on, some patients were lying on the bed. Others, like me, had sat on the wheelchair while nurses read our files and spoke to us.

After what seems like an hour, i was so tired from waiting that i fell asleep, right on the wheelchair, i dont remember anything.

Back outside, bbbb and mum sat at the waiting room where there was a TV indication of when i was starting my op.

i was awoken by the movement of some nurses very near me. She introduce herself as the Anesthesiologists and will be be accompanying me into the theatre.

As she confirms my information (name, ic, allergys.. ) the woman besides me starting screaming out loud. It was a terrifying scream (not shout) that requires 9 nurses to hold her down. My heartbeat race so fast i wasnt thinking. I covered my right ear while the nurse continue instructing me... then as the woman scream louder and louder i couldnt stay calm anymore and i covered both ear and cried and shiver.

The nurses quickly wheeled me away from the waiting room and onto the theatre. The picture above was taken off the net but i remember it being somewhat similar to this except much much brighter. i was told to lie on the bed, they remove the knot on my dress, fasten my legs with a band.

Then a tube was inserted into my right hand, and upon lying down the nurse told me she hadnt notice the huge stomach i was carrying until then.

"are you pregnant or might be pregnant by any chance?"

i told her i wasnt, she was worried and thus told me i need to be induce with a heavier dose of medication. Afraid that i might be allergy to the medication, she instructed another nurse to hold my neck down and prevent my vomit. As soon as i pass out, they inserted a tube down my throat and onto my stomach to pump the medication. They also insert a urinary tract onto me. I dont remember any of this, but suffer the after effect when i woke up.

*Meanwhile Mum and bbbbbb were waiting outside anxiously for my completion. bbbbbbbb even left a comment on facebook.

and 3 hours later... it finally ended..

i remember waking up, very irritated by someone that woke me up.. Den when i woke up, i was soooo weak and the environment was so unfamiliar... Then i heard the nurse says "Kristal.... can you hear me? Time to wake up your operation is over "

and then i recall... OMG #$%#$^#$% i just had an op..... my throat feels soooooooo dry so i tried to cough, there were soooo much phelgm inside me, but as i cough i felt something pinching my stomach, then i remember i had an op in the stomach....

it was all so surreal, i couldnt believe it was concluded....

"was i still bloated"

" are my stomach closed"

"why dont i feel much pain"

"shit the phelgm is choking me"

"its tooooooooo cold here"

i shiver so much and with all the phelgm in my throat i teared and tried to shout "i am soooooooo cold"

the nurse told me not to cry but i couldnt hold my tears.. they immediately placed a hot-air blanket over me, but i was trembling so hard.... i remember the nurses talking among themslves... i took the time to doze off to sleep, but each voices that surround me makes its so much difficult to sleep.

Then the hot-air blanket was too hot it burnt my wound.... again i had difficulty talking... and so i cried... mumbling "too hot.. too hot... " and den i fell unconscious.

Next moment i woke up, it seems like days had passed, but no! hahah.. it had only be less than a min..... i was wheeled out, i saw the man beside me still unconscious from his op, he had a scar on his neck, it was painful just seeing that.

As i was wheeled out, i had difficulty taking in all the images i was seeing, mostly i remembered ceiling after ceiling.... lift.. den more ceiling.

Later that day, bbbbbb added a comment on Facebook, i had been warded =)

i fell in and out of sleep to remember too much, except tearing and tearing each time i saw my Mum and bbbbbbbbbb...... whenever i saw bbbbbb i whisper into his ear how the phelgm was choking me, he was worried and seek the nurse opinion.

But i cant cough, it will expose my wound, they said i need to cough it out once and for all, den suffer the pain for a while, but i dont have the courage to do so..... The phelgm were built due to the dosage of medication i was put on and thanks to the tube inserted inside my mouth. I remember nothing of them....

*to continue my recovery on the next post

~Sweet.Silly.Stinky.Sleepyhead~