Wednesday, March 21, 2007


my eyes are swollen.. so hard to fall asleep.

tink missing someone can get pretty tough

i've been missing too much, too many people..



everyday work pile seems aimlesss, yet the hatred for it grew.
Everyday's worries seems increasing, yet the solution remain unsolved
Everyday i wish for some reason he could fasten his trip and return

today i broke down hard again, Dad saw me and scolded me. He blame me for making the man worried and losing his focus to concentrate on his army work. i feel its my fault so i so wanna be selfish, i so wanne have him back for myself.

Tomorro's gonna suck, i lost ALL my friends who agreed to hang out
Took me a while to decide to hate them cos it will mark another day of crying at home.
It also took me a while to understand sometimes things just doesn;t go ur way.
The man couldn't hold on his emotion anymore, i guess i am bringing him too much pressure too.. he kept silence, so did i. Then we hang up, then he sent me an sms, and i wasn't feeling any better..

rEsults came out, nuttin glory about it, yes, eligible for uni.. so what?
work sucks, as usual, my life is in a complete mess, and i felt so is the relationship, if only i could fall back to being what i use to be, to cheat and fool around when he is away and fall back into his arms when he return.

but i am a changed person....

*i wanna separate myself from the world, but i see myself blending into them.

when my first pay comes, i will splurge, leave no cents, cos this pay is too tough to be kept, i hate my off days, i hate staying alone at home..

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